It’s the holidays, and once again, Facebook and Instagram feeds throughout the land are bedazzled with photos of happy couples, a ring conspicuously featured on one of their hands. A clever caption that might as well (but doesn’t actually) say “We’re engaged!” floats nearby or inside the photo itself, while a gazillion “likes” and congratulatory comments trail at the bottom.

You want to feel happy for them. And you probably do! But happiness isn’t always the only emotion present –especially if you are single. Yes, my single compatriots, you feel joy in the celebration of your friends’ love, yet you also feel jealous. And then you feel bad about yourself for feeling jealous.

And perhaps you aren’t even jealous of them and their engagement, but of the social status that goes along with it. The engagement announcement carries with it a strange sense of failure, and perhaps the shame of Why do I not have a partner?

If this sounds familiar, congratulations.  You have stumbled upon one of the many manifestations of Partner Privilege, the invisible force in society that rewards people for being in committed romantic relationships, and shames those who are not. Continue reading →